Guest Post: The Mother-of-the-Bride speaks up!

Hello! Just a reminder if you haven't already...be sure to cast your vote in my Wednesday Wedding Poll! So far, french cream is in the lead!

I am so excited to feature my wonderful mother today on her experiences with Mother-of-the-Bride dress shopping! I think many of us get caught up in the "me, me, me" of weddings and forget that dress shopping can be just as nerve-wracking for our mothers (and mother-in-laws) as it is for us! Some things to keep in mind:

a) Our mothers are just as nervous about finding "the" dress for our weddings as we are.
b) How can you not worry about how the other "mother" will look/wear? There's only one bride at a wedding...there are two "mothers-of-the-bride/groom"
c) They want to do everything they can to make sure your day is perfect, and that includes looking great for your pictures.

In addition to her daily comments on the blog, which I'm sure many of you have noticed, you're going to start seeing LOTS of my mom for various reasons as we get closer to the wedding . So without further ado, here is my mom's guest post:

I am not a fussy kind of woman. I wear little make-up, I’m not a jewelry monger, nor am I a fashionista. Clothes, unlike make-up and jewelry, are a necessity. I like clothes that are comfortable and wear like iron. This brings me to my dilemma: As the mother-of-the-bride I feel compelled to look and act in a fashion that is not really who I am. I have to look a certain way, act with a little more decorum than I normally would, and in general not embarrass the bride, myself, or the family! Pretty tall order for me!

Which brings me to the biggest problem I’m facing. I’m anything but tall! I’m not even average. I’m all of 4’11’-also known as 59 inches. Not a lot to work with here, folks. I’ve been searching online and in stores for the right Mother-of-the-Bride dress and can’t find anything that I really like. Even my daughters, Laura and Melissa, accompanied me to the great and wonderful King of Prussia Mall. We visited 4 stores and I tried on at least 60 dresses, all to no avail. I did go to a wonderful store in New Hope called Sterling’s with my husband. Mind you this was about the ninth store I had been to and is an hour-and-a-half drive from our house. The dresses were fabulous and the woman who helped me was very accommodating, to say the least. I tried on another gazillion dresses and narrowed it down to three. When I stepped out in this dress my husband said “Wow!”

That’s a pretty good sign, eh? He didn’t even grunt at any of the other dresses. So then the discussion ensued regarding the cost of the dress and the additional cost of the alterations. Now, remember I’m all of 59 inches. That means we'd have to:

• Hike up at the waist to preserve the detail of the hemline.
• Alter the top-because everything hits me lower than the average bear (cleavage is fine but it’s best to keep the puppies pretty well penned up!).
• Altering the top means that it needs to be taken up at the shoulders which also means...
• The ruffle needs to be adjusted.

In short, it needed to be taken in, let out, and pulled up- all of which led to a let down for me. By the time all was said and done we were looking at well over $1,000 dollars for a dress that I’d be wearing once for literally a few hours. Plus, at least another two hour-and-a half drives to New Hope. I just can’t bring myself to spend that much time and money on something I’ll wear once. 

June 1981

I think back to how easy it was to find my wedding dress. My wedding dress was found in my mother’s cedar chest and needed absolutely no alterations. How lucky was that?! It was beautiful Chantilly lace, fit perfectly, and was free! Not only have I spent more time looking for a MOB dress than my own wedding dress, I’ve actually spent more time looking for my MOB dress than I will spend wearing it!

I’ve also noticed that bridesmaid’s dresses have names like clover, lilac, daisy, chocolate, and cotton candy. MOB dresses have names like champagne, cognac, wine, kalua, and eggplant. Seriously? Eggplant? Let me just say unequivocally that I am done planting eggs! I don’t want a dress called eggplant and what’s with all the alcohol names for colors? Of course, if finding a MOB dress is this stressful, I could be driven to drink! (Mother: There are plenty of bridesmaid dresses called "eggplant!" and it's a beautiful color!!)

I did find one very nice dress at KOP Mall that is somewhat suitable for a wedding, so that is my fall-back dress. I’m just so limited in what looks good on me. 

Empire waist with a V-neck or sweetheart neckline. That truly is it. (preferably in purple size 12P.) 

Anybody have one of those in their cedar chest?